The Marauders and the Fetch of Hogwarts

That evening, after Sirius had been given a tour of the house and dinner finished, the three males settled in the library with some tea and cakes provided by a courteous Teffie. After being spoken to pleadingly by Remus, Teffie's attitude had gentled from stark disapproval to watchfulness, as if she expected Sirius to suddenly abuse her. Sirius had remarked on the pleasantness of Teffie at dinner and stated he wished his family elf was half as good-natured as Teffie. This prompted Remus to do some discreet digging deeper into Sirius' background, for the sake of his curiosity and Teffie's peace of mind.

"Our house elf?" Sirius looked surprised when asked to talk about his family house elf. Teffie had stopped her sock darning in her corner, though her eyes remained fixed on the sock.

"You said something about her not being friendly at dinner?" prompted Remus casually.

Sirius grimaced. "He. Kreacher is his name. My mother thought is was clever. K-r-e-a-c-h-e-r," Sirius spelled out the name when Remus and Phineas looked confused. Phineas snorted in disgust. "He worships my mother, so therefore he can't stand the sight of me. He tattles a lot. Told my father about the owls I was sending to you, James and Peter. That's what my mother meant in Hogsmeadee. I had sent a letter to James when I'm not supposed to associate with 'blood traitors' like the Potters. They have to know who I am writing to. Wouldn't want their son hanging around with the wrong sort."

Sirius' tone indicated his view of his parents' opinion.

Phineas gave another disgusted snort. "I'm surprised we passed inspection, then."

"Do you associate with Muggles?" asked Sirius, half-interestedly.

"Actually, I regularly attend the local Muggle town meeting and keep abreast of Muggle politics," answered Phineas.

Sirius looked surprised. "I'm surprised you passed as well. Is it common knowledge?"

Phineas looked up from his research notes with a wry grin. "Not really but then not too many families associate with us. I'm considered a bit eccentric, you see, because of my alchemy obsession." He winked at the boys before going back to reading his notes. "Is anyone nice to your family elf?" he asked blandly.

Sirius shrugged and reached for a cake. "Kreacher came to us when I was little. I remember trying to give him some candy once when I was seven or eight. He threw it at me and went and told my mother I'd tried to give him clothes. I never tried being nice to him again, especially after I was grounded for a month."

Phineas gave a small sigh. "A shame. I've never known a house elf who did not deserve the loyalty equal to that which they give."

Sirius looked thoughtfully at Teffie, who tensed under the scrutiny, her eyes never leaving the hole she had restarted darning. Remus expected Teffie to say or do something under that unnerving blue gaze but she remained collected.

"If my family had a house elf like Teffie, they'd have broken her in a thrice." Sirius' eyes darkened. "Like they try to break me, but I'm not giving in." He gave a sudden grin. "A house elf who's appreciated certainly cooks much better, I'll give you that!"

Remus couldn't help but laugh at Teffie's astonished expression. She muttered something that vaguely sounded like "silly Sirius Black." She warmed to Sirius the rest of the evening though and began fussing over him like she did Remus and Phineas come bedtime.

Despite several guestrooms that were at Sirius' disposal, the boys opted for sharing Remus' room the first night. They were up late chatting, laughing and plotting the new school year's adventures until Teffie came storming in to tell them to turn off the light and go to bed. For someone who had no apparent love of house elves, Sirius meekly did as he was told.

The next morning Teffie seemed to have decided that Sirius needed guidance in the matter of house elves. He received extra helpings at breakfast. His room was sparkling and his clothes neatly pressed and put away. Anything Sirius required Teffie fetched without comment or complaint.

Sirius was befuddled. "Right little tyrant, isn't she?" he asked after being informed by Teffie that it was too early for hot chocolate and was brought a cup of tea instead at one o'clock in the afternoon.

"Nah," Remus chuckled. "She was horrified we were bringing you here. She hid your letter so I wouldn't know you wanted to visit. She thought you might be like the rest of your family."

Sirius looked pensive. "Apparently she's changed her mind."

Remus gave him a knowing look. "Apparently so have you." Sirius gave a rueful shrug.

The days passed quickly, too quickly it seemed. Sirius and Remus enjoyed exploring the Muggle village nearby, playing games, and just sitting and chatting. Phineas only had to reprimand Sirius once and that was when Sirius curiously went into the basement after being told it was off-limits. Remus hoped Sirius hadn't gotten down far enough to see the cage in the corner. If he did, it was never mentioned.

James and Peter both sent letters on when they would be going to Diagon Alley and the Lupin household adjusted their schedule accordingly. Owls with Sirius and Remus' Hogwarts letters arrived one crisp August morning and Sirius had the distasteful task of asking his parents for more money. Remus noted that Sirius asked for quite a bit more than necessary and received it without comment.

Diagon Alley was bustling with people when the two Lupins and Sirius stepped through the doorway from The Leaky Cauldron. They had traveled through Muggle London, which had fascinated Sirius no end, as he was still exclaiming over some of the strange things they'd seen. A few people from school greeted them as they headed to Gringotts.

"Sirius Black!" The voice that shrieked Sirius' name was high-pitched and shrill.

Sirius grimaced and sighed. "Damn," he muttered. "Mother."

"Papa, I'll stay with Sirius," Remus told his father, who gave him an approving glance and continued on into Gringotts.

"There you are!" Mrs. Black huffed at her eldest son, ignoring Remus completely. "Your father and I have to speak with you about the amount of money you sent for. Explain yourself!"

Sirius took a steadying breath. "Mother, you remember Remus Lupin?" He motioned to Remus, apparently trying to show up his mother with manners.

Mrs. Black's narrowed gaze brushed over Remus dismissively and she gave an indifferent nod. "I said explain yourself, young man."

Sirius looked like he swallowed bobotuber puss. "I need school clothes, Mother, and new robes, books, parchment, ink -"

"For one hundred galleons when I know for a fact that you have not ordered anything from either Madam Malkin or Monsieur Deus?" Mrs. Black was turning an alarming shade of purple. "I know what you wanted that money for and I won't have a son of mine buying a broomstick so he can play for *Gryffindor*." Her tone dripped acid, leaving no doubt in anyone's mind her opinion of anyone from House Gryffindor.

"When I become a Slytherin like a true Black, Mum, may I have a broom?" The whiney voice came from somewhere behind Mrs. Black.

Her face became the perfect picture of doting motherhood. She drew a boy at least a year younger than Sirius from behind her. Remus was startled by how twin-like the boy was to his older brother.

"Naturally, my dear," cooed Mrs. Black with open affection. "I expect nothing from the son who will undoubtedly be a scion of pureblood perfection." She glared hatefully at her eldest, making clear her opinion of what she thought of Sirius.

"Remus, this is Regulus, my little brother." Sirius almost managed to keep the distaste for his sibling hidden. "He'll be a first year this year."

'Oh goody,' thought Remus as the two brothers glared daggers at each other and Mrs. Black offered her oldest son her ultimatum.

"That money is all you get this year, Sirius," she stated sharply. "I've also informed Mr. Mervin at Quality Quidditch Supplies that you are not to purchase a broom." She squinted at Sirius meanly. "And I'll know," she warned ominously before sweeping off without a farewell.

Remus felt a sudden spurt of mischief. "Nice seeing you again, Mrs. Black!" he called out cheerfully.

She turned around, an affronted expression on her face. For a moment it looked as if she was going to make some rude comment in return but settled instead on, "Come along, Regulus, my pet."

Before Regulus could take a step, Remus had grasped his hand and gave it a hearty shake. "See you on the train," Remus told the younger boy with dripping sweetness. Regulus looked mortally offended and followed the Black family matron away.

Remus turned to Sirius for his friend's expression to find one of delighted shock on Sirius' features. Before Remus could say anything, Sirius dissolved into a fit of loud laughter. It was several minutes before he could even drag in a full breath. Tears were streaming down Sirius' face and he couldn't speak clearly.

"I have never," gasped Sirius, "seen anyone put my mother in her place with a lesson in good manners."

Remus was pleased with Sirius' obvious approval. "Glad you enjoyed that. I couldn't resist. She was being so rude to you."

"It was the perfect set down," agreed Sirius, wiping tears from his face.

"Yes," drawled Phineas Lupin from behind them. "Very clever indeed." His tone didn't indicate he was very pleased, however.

Both boys turned around quickly and Remus' good feeling faded at the sight of his father's frown. "Papa, I-"

Phineas held up a hand and Remus immediately subsided. "We will discuss this at home, but that was a reckless thing to do, Remus."

Sirius noted Remus' disheartened look and jumped to his friend's defense. "He didn't do anything he shouldn't have," began Sirius.

"I said later, boys," Phineas admonished sternly but added in a gentler tone, "but let's go shopping, shall we? Sirius, give me the money your parents sent you." Sirius did as he was told and off they went.

From shop to shop, the packages they were lugging around grew with each stop. New robes, parchment, quills, ink, books, potions ingredients, underclothing, and fun things like candy supplies and Exploding Snap cards heaped up in the boys' arms. The awkward moments following the confrontation with Mrs. Black was temporarily forgotten.

After leaving their purchases at The Leaky Cauldron, Phineas treated the boys to ice cream sundaes at Fortescue's. Phineas finished his first, told the boys to wait at the table while he ran a couple more errands. After he left, Sirius and Remus chatted and people-watched, keeping keen eyes open for Peter and James.

They spotted their other friends at the same time and a typical boy reunion took place. Several moments of talking at the same time, back thumping and good-natured ribbing took place before James and Peter ordered their own sundaes. Sirius and Remus recounted their time together at Lupin Manor and then Peter and James began relating their summer holidays.

Peter finished his strawberry shortcake first and said, "My mum and I went to New York City."

"Wow!" exclaimed Remus. "To America? Why?"

"We have cousins there who always visit us but we never visit them," Peter explained.

"What's it like?" asked Sirius, going all starry-eyed.

"Busy," Peter informed him flatly. "And noisy. Noisier than London."

"That's it?" demanded James incredulously. "You didn't go sightseeing or anything?"

"Well of course we did!" Peter stated indignantly. "I got everyone presents too, but you'll have to wait til we're on the train for them. I left them at home."

"Awesome," breathed Remus in wide-eyed wonder. "You went to America, Peter. The land of golden roads and opportunities everywhere."

Peter wrinkled his nose. "And lots of spooky ghosts and Muggles who think they are vampires or werewolves. Americans are crazy."

Everyone laughed. "I had a cousin that went to America before I was born," Sirius said. "He went to California and said he'd never go back. He said Americans were crazy too."

"Never known anyone who went to America before," confided James. "I have a boring family. We always go to Scotland and then to visit my mum's parents in Calais." He sighed. "That had to have been exciting. How'd you get there, Peter?" Peter continued to answer questions the rest of the visit and that's how Phineas Lupin found them.

He was carrying two large, long boxes and one cage. "Hello, boys," he greeted and they jumped to their feet.

Remus' eyes widened when he saw the cage. "Papa, what's wrong with Diogenes?" he asked, referring to the Lupin family owl.

"Nothing." Phineas handed Remus the cage with a medium-sized brown owl, who hooted contentedly. "I thought you might like your own now. You're old enough and you won't have to use the school owls to send me letters anymore."

"Th-thank y-you, Papa," stammered Remus shyly. Phineas beamed as Remus' friends exclaimed over the prized gift. Not many boys their age had their own private owls after all. "You'll have to think of a name for him, won't you?" Remus nodded numbly. "And I must admit I splurged shamelessly this year, but that last potion netted us quite a little bit so I thought what the heck."

Sirius and Remus each received a long box. James and Peter were wide-eyed as Remus and Sirius eagerly ripped the paper off and opened the boxes.

"WHOA!" shouted Sirius jubilantly. "A Nimbus 1750? Mr. Lupin, how did you-"

"Yes, Mr. Lupin, how *did* you?" drawled the voice of Mrs. Black three tables over. How the boys had missed the arrival of the Blacks, no one knew.

"I purchased them, Mrs. Black, with galleons. That's how transactions for goods are normally made." Phineas' sarcasm was not lost on either of the adult Blacks.

"I see," snapped Mr. Black. "Then you wouldn't mind returning the money my son borrowed from me, if he has any left?"

Phineas looked coolly at Sirius' parents and then glanced at Sirius, who was clutching his broom and glaring at his parents defiantly. "Why, certainly, if you insist." Phineas pulled out the half-empty bag of gold, silver and bronze coins. "Though I was given to understand by Mrs. Black that what Sirius didn't spend on school supplies he was allowed to keep."

The crowd that gathered frowned at the words and Mr. Black, ever conscious of the family's public appearance, backed down immediately. "I was just checking. We'd forbidden the boy from purchasing a broom, you see, and was suspicious he disobeyed."

The crowd turned back to Phineas for his reaction. "My sincerest apologies," apologized the elder Lupin, not sounding the least bit sorry. "I was unaware that Sirius was not allowed to have a broom. So," Phineas paused delicately. "You never taught him to fly then?"

Mr. Black went beet red and Mrs. Black purpled. Regulus, out of misguided loyalty, put his foot in the middle of things by exclaiming hotly, "My dad's the best flyer there is. He taught me and Sirius everything there is to know about flying!" He was astonished when his mother surreptitiously bonked him on the head.

"Well then, there's no problem. I'm sure you'll be thrilled if Sirius makes his house team?" Trapped the Blacks could only mumble some feeble reply and storm away. The crowd dispersed and Phineas Lupin turned to find himself caught in the hero-worshipping gaze of Sirius Black.

"That was brilliant, Mr. Lupin," breathed Sirius in awe. "I see where Remus gets it."

"Remus was a bit lacking in tact but his method was efficient all the same. I fear, however, that it has just compounded our problems, Remus." Phineas' meaningful gaze parlayed a message that Remus didn't understand. "I'm glad you enjoyed the gifts, however." The boys exclaimed over the brooms some more, with Sirius, James and Peter scandalized that Remus didn't know how to fly much. "I'm not much of a flyer myself," confessed Phineas, which scandalized the boys even more.

After another half hour of letting the boys chatter, Phineas herded his two charges toward The Leaky Cauldron and soon they and their packages were at Lupin Manor and Teffie was fussing over them once again.