Free Falling

Seven

Recovery

"The test results are back, Miss Evans." I looked into Madam Pomfrey's hazel eyes then grasped James' hand. Sirius and Remus put their hand on my shoulders and Peter gave me a sympathetic smile.

We were sitting in the hospital wing, the four Marauders, Professor Dumbledore, and I, waiting to hear what else had been going on with my body.

"You have been greatly weakened by the Imperius Curse, but there has been no permanent damages physically or magically.

"As for other things, we tested you for pregnancy because there was a chance that someone had sexual relations with you while you were Stunned. The test came back negative.

"And then there's the Fertility Potion. You took a small amount, according to the test, but it was a very strong and effective potion. You may notice that your menstrual cycle will not begin for another two months. That means that the egg is still waiting to be fertilized." She looked back and forth between James and me. "It is my duty to advise you to refrain from any - er - sexual activities until your menstrual cycle comes again."

I blushed and nodded. From the corner of my eye, I could see James blushing and Sirius with a huge grin on his face.

"You may also experience dramatic mood swings. I assure you all that that is normal due to the Fertility Potion.

"Miss Evans," Madam Pomfrey continued. "I see it fit for you to leave the hospital wing - as long as you come up here during lunch break to take Coughing Potion."

My lip curled in disgust. Since I had been in the infirmary, which was about a month, I had developed a type of bronchopneumonia and had to take several potions. Now, I only had a slight cough, and had to take Coughing Potion -- which tasted by far worse then any Muggle cough syrup. It was green and tasted like dirt. Even thinking about it made my stomach churn.

"There is one more thing," Dumbledore spoke up for the first time that whole meeting. "As much as we are all pleased to have Miss Evans in her right and healthy state, there are still rules in this school. Miss Evans, it is my duty to take one hundred points from Gryffindor House for roaming in the halls after hours." I nodded--I deserved more points taken away, for none of this would have happened had I obeyed the rules. "Mr.'s Potter and Black," Dumbledore continued, turning to James and Sirius. "It takes courage to save someone's life, but it takes even more courage to not go off on your own and come to an adult for help. For that, I award you fifty points each. Also, with the bravery you have shown, I award you fifteen points each." James and Sirius smiled, their cheeks rosy.

"Thank you all for everything," Dumbledore said, standing up. "And we all look forward to having you back in classes." With that, Dumbledore left the wing, his silver hair sweeping behind him.

"Well, you're free to go, Lils," Sirius said, motioning his hands towards the door. I smiled, got up from my bed, and headed towards the infirmary door.

Once outside the infirmary, Sirius said, "I understand everything she said to you, except for the part where she said that a side effect would be dramatic mood swings. Can you put that into English?"

"It practically means that I'm going to be PMS-ing for the next two months," I stated. Sirius and James stopped in their tracks and glanced at each other with wide eyes.

"Does that mean you'll be a total bitch for the next two months?" asked James cautiously. "Are our lives going to go to hell?"

"Am I really that bad?" I asked. I took their silence as a yes. "Oh, come on guys, she said mood swings. That doesn't mean I'll be bitchy for three months...then again, you never know."

I started walking up the wooden staircase.

"Well, what kind of mood swings are we talking about?" asked Remus.

"Oh honestly!" I said, irritated. "Madam Pomfrey said 'you may' which means I might. It doesn't mean I will."

"It's already begun," I heard Sirius mutter. I walked down the corridor faster.

"If you want to tell me about my mood swings, go ahead. It's not like you're the ones that have been through hell and now you can't have any fun because of your condition." I stalked off.

"What does she mean by she can't have any fun because of her condition?" Peter asked.

"Put two and two together, Wormtail," Sirius said. "We all know what that one meant, right James?"

"Just leave her alone, all right, guys. She's right, she has had a bad past month. We all have," James said.

I walked into the common room and up the stairs to my dorm.

* * *

"Lily?" I heard James call into my dorm.

"Hmm?"

"What are you doing?"

"Sleeping," I mumbled.

"Mind if I join you?"

I smiled and scooted over.

"Why not?"

James crawled into my bed with me.

It was midnight on a Wednesday night one month after I had gotten out of the hospital wing. I was previously alone in my dorm for Astronomy classes were taking place and Madam Pomfrey had told me that I couldn't do those lessons for a while because I needed my rest. Of course, I didn't have any objections - I would be alone in my dorm to get some peaceful sleep.

But James was now in my dorm, his body was warm next to mine, I felt a tingle go down my spine as he kissed my lips.

"Mm," I moaned. "I thought you were supposed to be in Astronomy?"

"Why would I go off and have fun without you, darling?"

"Oh, and this is more fun?" I teased.

"Well, maybe a little snog would help," he said.

"I definitely wouldn't object to that," I purred.

"Good," he said in between kisses. "I haven't had any time to spend alone with you."

"I know. It's been driving me mad."

"Me too," he whispered, kissing me again.

After a few minutes of uncontrollable snogging, James' hands started moving up and down my back, tickling my spine. I moaned and reached for the buttons of his shirt. Soon my hands were roaming over his bare chest, his lips were moving down my throat. He reached for the buttons of my nightgown and started fumbling with them, after each one was opened, his kisses moved lower and lower. My fingers entangled in his thick, midnight hair. His lips had reached my breasts and were traveling down, down across my abdomen. I reached down, starting to unbutton his trousers.

"Lily, what the hell are we doing?" James asked, sitting up abruptly.

"Mm, don't stop, James," I moaned.

"Lily, I don't think-" he started, but I pressed my lips onto his and kissed with wild passion.

James pulled away from me. I looked at him with innocent shock.

"Lily," he said calmly. "This isn't such a good idea."

"Why not?" I asked, annoyed.

"This isn't like you, Lily. You know that it's only been a month since you got out of the hospital wing. You have a few weeks to go before the Fertility Potion wears off."

"Never mind that," I whispered. "I've waited five years for this day, I can't wait any longer."

James' cheeks flushed.

"Five years? Lily, this isn't right. We can't do this now. You're not in your right mind."

"Of course I'm not in my right mind - I'm under the influence of James Potter."

"Lily," he said, buttoning his shirt once more, "we both know that this isn't what we want right now."

"That's not what it looks like," I retorted. James blushed and buttoned his trousers.

"You know exactly what I mean, Lily. We both know the consequences of sleeping together when you're still under the Fertility Potion. I know you don't want to become pregnant right now. We need to take it easy for now."

I buttoned my nightgown, pulled my hangings back, and got up from the bed.

"Where are you going?" he asked.

"Right now you're sounding like my father, James, and right now, I don't fancy sleeping next to my father."

I stalked off to the bathroom. I heard James sigh then leave the dormitory.

* * *

"Tell me again why she's mad at you?" I could hear Sirius say.

I was sitting, concealed, on the stairs to the girls' dormitories. It was close to midnight. I had claimed to Sirius and Remus that I was going to bed, but really, I sat on the staircase and thought of why I was mad at James, when I shouldn't have been. But there was a strange grudge holder side of me, which wasn't normal. It was as if I hadn't been myself lately.

"I've told you," James said, in a hurt and annoyed tone. "She hasn't been in her right mind. It's that potion."

"Yeah, but what's she mad about?"

"I wouldn't have sex with her," James said. I imagined his cheeks coloring at this statement.

"She's hacked off because you wouldn't shag her?" Sirius said, with an air of laughter. "Man you have a lot of self-control to stop yourself from not sleeping with her. Let's face it, she's beautiful, hot, gorgeous, however you want to put it. And she has a nice body. And her personality is great. The way her jade eyes light up when she smiles. James, you are my idol. My idol."

"That's enough, Sirius," Remus said. "We all agree, but we're here to help James patch up things with Lily."

"She's been hacked off at me for over a week. It's definitely not like her to hold a grudge. She never holds grudges."

"James, we all know that it's the potion that's making her go through these mood swings," Sirius said. "And you know how she is when she's wrong: She'd rather burn at the stake than admit it." I bowed my head in shame, for Sirius' statement was true. "James, no matter how right you think you are, you need to go to her and be the peacemaker."

"You're right," James sighed. "I love Lily more than anything. I'd give my life for her. I need some time alone."

I heard footsteps across the common room fading as James left Gryffindor tower.

I got up from the stairs and went to my dorm to think over what Sirius had said.

James was right, I thought. We both knew the consequences and he was the only one to do something about it. To make it stop before it was too late and we regretted it. I couldn't believe I was angry with James over such a petty thing as sex. Sex can come and go and it lasts for a while, but love is around forever. It never goes away. I needed to apologize to James.

* * *

The next day, which was Saturday, I spent the day in my dorm, thinking about how to apologize to James for being an inconsiderate little...never mind that - the important part was that I knew Sirius was right and I needed to tell James I was sorry.

What should I say? What could I do? I had been completely rude on my part and the truth was that I knew I had been. But I wasn't going to let this one go as if I were the one that was right.

* * *

After Charms class on Monday, two weeks later, I cornered Sirius. James gave me a hurt look, and Remus grinned nervously. Peter was picking up some book that he had dropped. James and I had talked only necessarily during the past month, and it was killing me.

"Sirius," I hissed. "I need you to help me."

"With what?" he whispered back.

"Um...I need to apologize to James for being a bitch to him."

Sirius gave me an appraising look.

"Are you telling me that you were wrong and that you're going to admit it?"

"Oh, shut it, Sirius. We all know I was wrong and, yes, I am admitting it. Now, what I want you to do is-"

"Wait, wait, wait. You're admitting it, and you're going to apologize?"

"Would you just listen?" I raged. I quickly quieted when I saw that a group of passing Hufflepuffs were staring at us. "What I want you to do is get James in the common room alone next Monday. Don't tell him that it is me that wants him to be there, but make up some stupid reason why you have to leave, then the rest will be up to me. Do you think it would work?"

"First of all, just the fact that you're going to be face to face with James again will capture his attention so he'll listen. Secondly, he's so in love with you, Lils, that he can't even eat anymore. He's lost interest in everything and his marks are going down."

"He's stopped eating? Is that why he's been losing a lot of weight?"

"Yeah. Gosh, it's awful to see him like that, Lils; you have no idea."

"Jeez, I've been such a bitch to him. I don't know if I can wait until next Monday to talk to him."

"Hey, what's with Monday? Why not tomorrow?"

"Mm...Monday is a special date," I said, smiling. Sirius looked clueless for a while, then his eyes brightened and a smile spread across his face.

"Anything to help the lovely Lily," Sirius said with a bow. He put his arm around me and escorted me off to Defense Against the Dark Arts.

"So, it really came?" he asked. "Not that I'm interested in hearing about it," he added quickly.

"Yep," I replied with a sigh. "It really came."

Sirius kissed me on the cheek and bowed me into the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom.

* * *

Easter hols came that Sunday. We had a week off from classes the next week. Everybody in Gryffindor went home for the holiday except for Sirius, Remus, James, two first year boys, and me. Peter, who was a mamma's boy, went home to his mother and went to France to visit his grandmother.

All of Monday morning, I had butterflies in my stomach. I couldn't even believe I hadn't talked to James for a whole month. He didn't try to talk to me, either, but then again, I deserved it.

I was getting dressed into my best gown, which was the exact color of my eyes, it was modestly cut and hung to my body, when Sirius walked in.

"Sirius!" I exclaimed. "I'm only in my underwear!" I tried covering myself up, but it wasn't worth it, Sirius had seen me a lot more naked than this when I was tied to the bed in the Dark House, although he never mentioned anything about that.

"Lils, I'm only interested in looking at your face," he said, walking up to me. "Carry on."

I pulled my dress on and he zipped it up.

"Are you nervous?"

"Of course I am. I haven't talked to James for an entire month. How is he doing? You didn't tell him did you? Is he really pissed off at me? Will he even talk to me?" My words were like a whitewater river.

"Calm down, Lily," he cooed. "He'll talk to you. He's about to go out of his mind, to tell you the truth. He's about ready to beg for YOUR forgiveness."

"Well, he doesn't need to. If anything, I don't blame him for not talking to me. I mean, I wouldn't talk to me if I were him."

"You look gorgeous, Lils," Sirius said softly as I applied the finishing touches to my makeup.

"Okay, I'll be waiting at the top of the staircase for your signal," I said. I took a deep breath and expelled it loudly.

"Don't worry Lils, James is my best friend, I know him like I know a book-"

"Oh, and what book would that be? Since for five years you haven't opened a single book," I teased.

"You know what I mean. I'm using one of your Muggle expressions. Anyway, good luck." He kissed my cheek and exited my dorm, I followed silently.

"Jamesie-boy," Sirius called once he had reached the common room."

"Leave me alone," James, who was in the boys' dormitory, called grumpily down the stairs.

"James, you can't stay in there forever. Come down here."

"What do you want?" James asked, I could see the top of his head appear at the top of the stairs.

"Come play chess with me," Sirius said.

"Fine," James agreed.

"Good, you sit here by the fire and I'll go get our pieces."

"Sirius, I can go get them, I'm right here."

"Um...no, you sit here and I'll get them."

"Why are you acting so weird?"

"Weird? I'm not acting weird. You sit here and I'll be back soon." The last words were loud so I could here them. I heard James sigh as Sirius' footsteps were heard going up to his dorm.

I took another deep breath and started descending the staircase.

James looked up at me. I made eye contact with him and he looked slightly nervous. I walked over to the fire and sat in the chair next to the one he was sitting in.

"Hi," I said nervously.

"Hi," he said back, looking confused yet relieved. "What are you doing up this late? Doesn't Madam Pomfrey want you to get a lot of sleep." He sounded genuinely concerned and my heart melted.

"James," I said, trying to hold the lump in my throat back. "I need to talk to you about what has happened over the past month. I want you to know that I'm really sorry about the way I have been treating you lately. And I want you to know that it's not your fault that I acted that way. I hadn't been myself. And I want you to know that I - I love you." A tear rolled down my cheek.

James got up from his chair and sat on the arm of mine. He wiped the tear off and kissed me on the cheek.

"Lily, I know that it has been really hard for you lately. But it's been really hard on every single one of us," he said softly. "I've missed you so much, Lily."

"I've missed you too. And I'm so sorry for the way I've treated you. It wasn't right for me to do that. You were right that night, it would have been really stupid had we slept together. I don't know what came over me. It was just like all my brains and logic went away on holiday or something."

"Yeah, it can sometimes do that," James teased. I laughed. "So, on a more serious note, it's been two months since you got out of the hospital wing, how are - er - you doing?"

"As of last week, I'm back to normal," I said, smiling. James grinned widely and kissed my cheek.

"I'm glad," he said, meeting my lips.

"Not as glad as I am," I said. "That was hell, that was."

"It wasn't as bad as you being upset with me. Next time you're hacked off at me, just AK me and get it over with. I don't want to go through that again."

"Don't be silly," I said. "I wouldn't use the Killing Curse on you - I love you too much."

"Good," he said, kissing my earlobe. "I love you too much to let you kill me."

"That's good to know."

"Now what are we going to do?" he asked.

"Well, if you're being the typical teenage boy, my dorm is all to myself," I said slyly.

"Typical teenage boy?" he asked he asked with a smile. "Are you implying that all I think about is sex?"

"Oh, at least once every four minutes," I replied in a singsong voice.

"Hmm...that seems about right," he said. I laughed and kissed him again. "That empty dorm seems inviting," he whispered.

"Shall we?"

"Are you sure that the Fertility Potion has worn off?"

"Absolutely positive," I replied.

"Let's go."

James stood up and held out his hand. I took it and started leading him across the common room and up the stairs to my dormitory. James wrapped his arms around me and started kissing my neck. Soon I was swept off my feet and carried into my dormitory where James locked the door behind us.

* * *

The sunlight was creeping through the windows and my eyelids. I sighed. Had it been a dream? Had it been real? I slowly opened my eyes and rolled over to see James fast asleep under the blankets of my bed. I reached over and pinched his arm.

"Ow!" James exclaimed, his eyes flying open instantly. He looked at me. "What'd you do that for?"

"I was making sure that I wasn't dreaming," I replied, a smile on my face.

"Aren't you supposed to pinch yourself?" he asked.

"Ooo, somebody's cranky."

James smiled and rolled over to his side, facing me. I did the same.

"I'm not cranky," he replied. "I was sleeping. Sleep is precious to me."

"Well, I don't think you got much of that last night," I teased.

"Neither did you," he said.

"Yeah, but it was a hell of a lot of fun."

"You've got that right," he said, scooting closer to me and kissing my lips.

"What'll Sirius and Remus think?" I asked.

"Hmm...what else would they think?"

"You'd better get back to your dorm before they come looking for us," I said. "And I don't fancy them seeing me like this."

"But I do," James teased, pulling the covers over our heads and kissing deeply.

"Did you mean you want them to see me stark naked or that you want to see me stark naked?"

"I don't want them to see you naked. I want you all to myself."

"You'd better leave, else they will come looking for you; you know that."

"I know, I know, but you aren't making it easy for me to leave."

"You had better go, James."

"I love you, Lily," he said, getting out of bed and picking up his clothes that had been scattered throughout the room.

"I love you too, James." I said with a smile on my face that I couldn't get rid of.

James pulled on his clothing, leaned over and kissed me one last time, and left me to myself in my dorm.

I sighed and thought of last night. It was romantic and fun. James was really nervous. Well, I was too, but I was much better at hiding it. James was trying to conjure some candles, but he couldn't get the spell right. Instead, he changed the color of my bed hangings from scarlet to a royal purple. The second time, he made the curtains of the window by my bed have a flower pattern. I was in a fit of giggles and James was blushing deeply. He gave me an embarrassed smile and then said the spell right, conjuring a hundred scarlet candles. With a flick of his finger, all the candles lit, creating a soft glow.

I looked at my hangings and curtains and chuckled. I reached for my wand then hesitated. These were relics of what James and I had shared. No, that was ridiculous. The first time is something you should keep in your heart, your soul, not something you should keep on the windows and bedposts. Besides, I doubt that my dorm mates would want their windows patterned with snow white Lily's. Hmm...how thoughtful of James to pick that flower. He had lilies on the brain. I wonder why....

I smiled and crawled out of bed, pulling on my dressing gown. I changed my bed hangings and the curtains back to their normal state then headed for a nice long shower.

* * *

I was in the shower, taking my sweet time, reminiscing of the night James and I spent together, when I heard someone walk in. How could that be? I thought I locked the door. I looked out from behind the shower curtain to see Sirius standing there, looking slightly nervous, yet slightly smug.

"Sirius!" I exclaimed. "What the hell are you doing in the girls' prefect bathroom? Did you not notice the door was locked? And how did you even know where it was?"

"Simple: The Marauder's Map," he said, pulling out a yellowed, rolled up piece of parchment.

"What are you doing in here?" I asked again.

"I just wanted to see if you're okay," Sirius said.

"Oh, hell! That's what you've interrupted my shower for? Yes, I'm perfectly fine."

"Well, I was just making sure."

"What makes you think I wouldn't be okay?"

"James isn't talking to me, so I was wondering what happened last night. Did you make him sleep in the common room?"

I let out a derisive laugh. Sirius must have not been using his common sense at the moment, or else James told him and he didn't believe him so he thought he'd get it out of me.

"Goodbye, Sirius. I want to get back to my shower now." I disappeared behind the curtain again.

"Lils, I'm just playing with you," Sirius said. I looked out the curtain again. "Congratulations."

My face flushed slightly. Well, what did I expect; that they wouldn't find out? That they'd be completely oblivious to the fact that James spent the entire night in my dormitory?

"Thanks," I said. "Now you're completely embarrassing me, so leave."

"I am. I just want you to know that I'm happy you and James are together. There's no one else that I'd rather see together than you and James."

"That means a lot to me, Sirius," I said. "That's really sweet and - "

"Unpredictable?"

I laughed.

"Yes. Sweet and unpredictable," I said. "Now can you leave? I'll talk to you later."

"You just take your sweet time. I love you, Lils," he said softly.

"And I you," I replied, smiling. Having Sirius as a friend was one of the greatest things that had ever happened to me.

* * *

Two weeks later, I saw James and Sirius conversing in low tones at the dinner table. I figured that they were planning as prank or being typical boys (and talking about what all guys talk about). I ended my conversation with Mina, a dorm mate of mine, and turned my ear to listen to them.

"He can't be serious, not while Dumbledore's around," James was saying.

"Yeah, but last time it was right under Dumbledore's nose," Sirius replied.

"He can't get to me while Dumbledore's here, he doesn't stand a chance."

"How can you say something like that? The man's a bleeding genius."

James looked up and elbowed Sirius, whom looked up and smiled a smile that didn't reach his eyes. His eyes were full of fear, cold, blackness.

"What are you two talking about," I asked slyly.

"Nothing," James blurted out quickly. Too quickly, I thought. I gave them a skeptical look, but started up a conversation about the upcoming Quidditch final against Slytherin.

"Of course we'll win," Sirius said loudly as a group of Slytherins walked past, causing them to scowl. "We've got the best Chaser Hogwarts has ever seen on our team." He placed his hand on James' shoulder as the Slytherins stalked off.

"It's true," I said, giving him a grin. "I've been watching you play Quidditch since second year. You are the greatest Chaser Hogwarts has ever seen."

"And that's why Lils is in love with you," Sirius teased. "That, and you're a demon in the sack."

"How would you know?" Remus, who had been listening in, asked with an arched eyebrow.

"Lils, could you pass me the peas please?" Sirius asked, glaring at his friend.

I handed Sirius the large bowl of peas. Sirius loaded peas on to the spoon and flung them at Remus.

Being slightly taken aback, it took Remus a second to retaliate. He grabbed his half-eaten roll and aimed it at Sirius. Right then I knew why Remus wasn't on the Quidditch team - the roll went straight at James' head, which caused James to throw a spoon full of mashed potatoes at Remus.

The food fight continued. I watched with very loud giggles. Peter got hit with a slice of beef and hid under the table. Sirius had hair full of treacle pudding, James was drenched backwashed in pumpkin juice, and Remus was green from all the peas Sirius had launched at him.

Professor McGonagall ran over to the Gryffindor table, which all were in giggles.

"Stop it this instant!" she cried. James and Sirius stopped. Peter came up from under the table. I was gasping for air from laughing so hard. "I expect more from Gryffindors. And to think that you, Potter, are a prefect. I hope you are completely ashamed of yourselves and I must take ten points off of Gryffindor and detentions."

She turned and stalked back to the high table. The boys just laughed.

"Man, I thought we'd be in even deeper trouble," Sirius said with a sigh. "It certainly helped to take my mind off of things."

"Tell me about it," James said.

"Why don't you tell me about it?" I asked.

"Oh, it's no reason. You know, nerves for the Quidditch match."

"Oh," I said. They were hiding something from me - I could feel it.

"I've got to go shower," Sirius replied.

"Haven fun. Ow! Oh right, I - uh - have to go shower too. Are you coming Remus, Peter?" James said, wincing. Something was up. I decided to take drastic measures.

"But James," I pouted, pushing my lips out slightly. "I want to shower with you."

James stopped what he was doing and looked at me. Sirius and Remus glanced at me, shocked, and then turned their gazes towards James.

"Well, um...you're not finished with your dinner yet. I'll meet you in the common room in an hour."

"I've already had enough to eat. Besides, you don't fancy showering with someone who's overweight, do you?"

"Lily, I don't think that's such a good idea right now. Maybe later tonight, but not now."

"But I want to now," I pouted. "I want you now."

Sirius and Remus looked at me again, this time with their mouths slightly hanging open.

"Lily, I'm gross and sweaty and covered in sticky pumpkin juice, now's not the time."

"I know you're keeping something from me," I said.

"What? What do you mean by that?" James asked.

"Since when have you ever declined to sex? Since when has any man ever declined to sex? There is something going on that you're not telling me. I can tell when you're lying and I know you are. I will not stand deception. Tell me and get it over with, that's all there is to it." I looked back and forth between the three of them. None of them were going to tell me. "If you decide you want to tell me, I'll be in m dorm. Until then, I'm not talking to any of you."

I got up and left the Great Hall, leaving James, Remus, and Sirius dumbstruck. I could here James calling me, telling me to wait as I walked up the marble staircase. I didn't turn around and I heard Sirius and Remus stop James and tell him that I was right and that they couldn't and shouldn't keep secrets from me. I kept walking.

I gave a frustrated sigh when I reached my dorm. I sat down on my bed. Maybe this was something I didn't want to know. No, if it were something important, I would want to know about it. Otherwise, I would just get pissed and wouldn't be able to help. Was I going about this the wrong way? Maybe, but like I said, take some acting classes or don't mention one thing because I will not stand deception.

There came a small knock at my door.

"Go away, James," I said. The door opened and someone walked in. "I said go a - Oh! Remus! I'm sorry, I didn't realize it was you."

"That's okay, Lily," Remus replied. "I just thought I ought to talk to you. Especially about what happened at dinner."

"I know. I shouldn't have stalked out like that."

"Not only that, but you were a complete bitch." I was slightly taken aback for I had hardly heard Remus cuss; he especially watched his mouth around me. "And you gave away too much information. What has gotten into you?"

"Me? I don't like being lied to. I know there's something wrong that the four of you aren't telling me. I was just using the shower as an excuse to see if he really was lying."

"Well, James wants to talk to you, so you better ask him what's up because it's not my place to tell you. Just give him a chance." Remus kissed my cheek and left the room. Not long afterwards, James entered the room and nervously sat next to me on my bed.

"I'm sorry, James. It was wrong of me to say things like that."

"No, no, I'm sorry, it wasn't and isn't right for me to keep things from you."

"Well, what is it?" I asked.

"First, I want to tell you I love you."

"I love you too, James," I replied.

"No, I mean I really love you. Lily, you complete me. You're the cure to all my fear and my pain. Have you ever been in love with someone so much that you feel as if you're falling?" He paused and brushed my hair out of my face. "I'm falling, Lily. Not just falling, but free falling - I have nothing to grab onto and nothing to stand in my way. Nothing will ever make me stop loving you." He leaned over and kissed me. "Now, for what I need to show you."

James pulled a crumple piece of parchment from out of his trouser pocket.

"It's this."

He unrolled the parchment and I started gravely at it.

"Holy shit," I whispered. James just nodded.

Written on the parchment in curvy handwriting was, "Beware, Potter, Beware." And at the bottom left corner was a skull and serpent: The Dark Mark.

Epilogue

The last month of my fifth year was the happiest I had ever remembered being at school. Despite the threatening note James had received from Voldemort, we returned to our normal selves.

When I was ready, I owled my mother and father about my abduction. They were angry that they hadn't heard of it right away, but they understood that I needed healing time. It still isn't something I enjoy talking about, almost six months later. They knew that I had good friends to help me get through my experience and they knew how much I trusted Professor Dumbledore.

In turn, when they owled me back, I received a small note from Petunia. I assume that Mum and Dad made her write this note, as I couldn't go on being uninformed of her news. Petunia was very serious about seeing someone with the name Dursley. They had been talking about marriage for quite some time, and after Petunia's seventh year, they were to be wed. I really don't know if Petty truly wanted me to come, but I know I have to go anyway. It's not that I don't want to go, but as nasty as my sister is to me...honestly, it makes me wonder...how could someone outside of the family love her in that way? I don't know.... Maybe it's because I think the name Dursley doesn't suit her. This Dursley sounds like a great prune....

I chose not to talk about my recovery, as those weren't the best times in my life. Spending several nights alone, crying like a small child on my bed in the hospital wing, wishing for anything that would make me forget the pain of almost being raped by the most infamous wizard of modern times. It doesn't do to dwell on memories of such when I can reminisce about the good times I had with Sirius, Remus, Peter, and James.

The four of them are the best things that have ever happened to me. I love them with every cell in my body. Even though I don't quite like Peter, I still love him. I don't know why I don't like him. There is a feeling that envelops me every time I think about him. It's being silly, really.... Perhaps I should ignore the burning in my brain that tells me to turn from him. Sirius, Remus, and James trust Peter with their lives, why shouldn't I?

The four of them were always there for me. They stick up for me always. And they know that I can't be touched by anyone else but them, otherwise, I freak out. They even started checking up on me. Even in the middle of the night. Of course, they always thought I was sleeping when they checked on me...but how could I sleep with the nightmares I had been having?

Nightmares still haunt me at least once or twice a fortnight. They are the same, over and over again, I see Lord Voldemort huddling over me, kissing me, pouring a glass of champagne mixed with Fertility Potion into my mouth. Many nights, I've been sneaking into the hospital wing for Dreamless Sleep Potion. Well, not exactly sneaking - James, Sirius, and Peter didn't know. I think Remus knows, though, but he won't say anything. Funny the way he works. I think that's why I love him, he's a mystery to me and I can still trust him with my every being.

The ride home on the Hogwarts Express was tranquil. We talked about the OWLs we had gotten. I received twelve OWLs, as did James. Sirius and Remus received eleven and Peter pulled through with nine. I am so proud of them! And, of course, they were proud of me. Sirius commented on how sure he was that James and I were going to get the position of Head Boy and Head Girl. "How precious," he had commented. "The Head Boy and Head Girl are two lovebirds."

At Kings Cross Station, I hugged Remus, and Peter and kissed them on the cheek. Then I kissed Sirius' lips lightly, pulled him into a deep hug, and thanked him for everything he had done for me. We both knew that our relationship had grown profusely since he had helped rescue me that night, only half a year ago.

Then I kissed James deeply. Since the beginning, I knew I loved James more than life itself. Some people don't understand that at age sixteen you can be truly in love, but James and I knew, as well as Sirius, Remus, and Peter.

James invited me to his house nearing the end of the holiday and I gladly accepted. It would be hard not seeing him for two months. Sirius, Remus, and Peter were going also, and I looked forward to seeing them outside of school.

As I got into the car with my mum, dad, and Petty, I watched my four best friends make their way to the barrier that led them to the Floo station where they would meet their parents. Driving back to where I called home only during summer hols, I thought about what upcoming adventures we would have next year at school. They were certain to be wild, and undoubtedly scary. Who knows? With Voldemort gaining power everywhere, we might even have a few more dangerous adventures. I shudder to think that, but, the five of us are capable of choosing our own destinies, and Dumbledore knows that. In a way, I think he is allowing us to take part in the war against the Dark Side. Strange to think that a group of sixteen-year-olds could be able to fight against the Dark Lord, but Dumbledore knows what he's doing.

All in all, it's been the most wonderful year ever. And I can't wait to see what happens in the years to come.

**The End of Part I of the Falling Trilogy**

A/N: Thank you, thank you, thank you to all those who have reviewed! I've been trying to post this story hastily, as I already had it finished months prior to posting it, but I didn't want to post it all at one time. So, I apologize for not making a list of all those kindly people who told me what they thought. I really appreciate it all the same! Really, I do!

Coming Soon:

James receives threatening notes from the Dark Lord and runs away to keep his friends safe...only to be captured. Voldemort reminisces of his past, his childhood, leaving James believing Even Angels Fall.

Even Angels Fall - Part II of the Falling Trilogy