The Beaters Anthology

All interviews are taken from interviews specifically for the "Beaters' Anthology" book and video series in 2036 unless noted otherwise in a parenthetical citation.

HARRY: The rush of Beatermania was really wearing off by 2005. It was great at first, but then it just became a hassle. We were being ushered around in and out of hotels and concerts, and we had like thirty minutes of the day to ourselves, and that included sleep time. Good ol' Snape made us keep our scheduled appearances, and the bugger had booked us at places until 2006! And then we had the movie. The thing about our movies is that we were commissioned to write a certain amount of songs, so it was just another burden. But we had Goldfish crackers to get us through it, so it wasn't as bad as it would've been without... (2018)

In January 2005, The Beaters were just finishing up their tours from 1964 and trying to get ready for their upcoming movie. At this time, the boys were beginning to get tired of touring. They had found that their studio time was being cut into by the constant concerts, interviews, and restless fans. But while their studio time was short, they had to squeeze as much productivity out of it as they could, seeing as how there was a movie coming up in which they had to write seven songs for.

But while the Fabulous Four were being pushed around every which way, they still had a few minutes of time for themselves.

HARRY: In January, I came out with my second book, An Italian in the Process. This book, while staying on the main category of short, humorous stories, was different in the fact that I wrote the whole thing after my first book release. My other book had been a collection of stories that I had written when I was young, but An Italian in the Process was entirely written when I was 24. Another thing I did differently is that I actually tried to develop my characters; in my first book, I just killed the characters off after a page or two... (2020)

Love also found it's way to Oliver.

OLIVER: In February, I married Katie Bell, my former Quidditch teammate from Hogwarts. She and I had lost contact after school, but then she somehow found that I was playing at 'The Grotto' in Liverpool, and we reunited then. I never really had any feelings for her at Hogwarts, but I suppose I was more occupied with Quidditch then than I was with her...

KATIE: It was tough at first. People wrote Oliver and me a bunch of hate mail about how I 'took Oliver away' from them. I helped him respond to all his mail, including the hate mail, so when we'd get one of these hurtful letters in the post, we'd send back a Howler. What made it really fun was that we mostly sent the Howlers to Muggles, and we'd get all these inquiries from the Ministry asking if we were doing all this; usually we'd just send them back a Howler too...

Ron was romantically involved at this time, too.

RON: Before '05 I was trying to keep my relationship with Padma Patil quiet, but I just didn't bother after awhile. Unlike the others, I kept in contact with her after Hogwarts and we met up again in 2003. We were unofficially engaged for a long time. What made it extremely weird is that Padma and Parvati are twins, and every once and awhile I'd get Harry mad when I'd accidentally kiss Parvati or something. It got so confusing after a while that I made Padma wear this necklace all the time; kind of like a dog collar...

On February 22, filming of The Beaters' movie, then entitled 'Eight Teeth to Bite You', began in the Bahamas. The movie was shot almost backwards: the end (in the Bahamas) was shot first, then scenes of the boys skiing (which were in the middle of the movie) next, and then the beginning, taking place in Britain, was shot last. In a strange turn of events, the title song, 'Gasp!', was written at the beginning of shooting, yet was never made the title of the movie until a thousand soundtrack albums had already been released in America sporting the name of the motion picture 'Eight Teeth to Bite You'. These mistake soundtracks are now worth much money. After the movie had been shot, then the title of the movie was decided to be changed to 'Gasp!'.

SEAMUS: We filmed in the Bahamas first. The scenes look like it's summer there, but it was February and we were freezing our pants off. They made us wear those summer clothes and go in the water and all that; it was very cold.

Then we went to Austria to film scenes of us skiing and stuff. I had never been on skis before; they just put them on my feet and pushed me down the hill and filmed. It was my first time on skis and my last time on skis...

We basically ate Goldfish crackers for breakfast every day. Richard Listerine almost went mad with us because we'd be so silly that we'd have to do each scene twenty times. There was one scene were we had to just like turn around and look surprised, and every time we did it, we'd burst out laughing. I'm very surprised that Richard Listerine didn't kill us all...

The filming of the movie lasted until March. In that same month, The Beaters were awarded at the Grammy Awards for 'Best New Artist of 2004' and 'Best Performance by a Vocal Group' for their song 'A Hard Day's Beat'.

HARRY: We were a bit confused when we won 'Best New Artist of 2004'; I mean, which one of us was the best new artist?... (2005)

After the filming of the movie 'Gasp!', the film had to be edited and put together in movie format, so it wasn't planned to be released until August. In the meantime, The Beaters had to come up with a few more songs to fill up the rest of the album. One of the most famous songs ever made by The Beaters, or by Ron for that matter, was 'Last Week's Mail'.

RON: 'Last Week's Mail' came to me in a dream one night. When I woke up, I had this tune in my head, and I figured it was from something I'd heard earlier. To be sure, I played the simple melody on my piano and recorded it on a tape player, then I went around to everyone and kept asking if they'd heard that song before. I asked Harry, Seamus, Oliver, George [Martin], Snape, Padma, and even my dog, Marta. When the realization came to me that this was an original song, I began to work on it immediately because it had such a good melody. Because I did the song all by myself, George Martin wanted to know if I wanted to release it as my own, or at least to put down just 'Weasley' instead of 'Potter/Weasley'; but we were very keen on staying together and so it's an official Beaters' song. When I was working on the lyrics, the working title was 'Sunny Side'; after I came up with 'Last Week's Mail', George asked me if he could do an instrumental arrangement of it, and I agreed and it was named 'Sunny Side'. I got all this mail after he released it saying "Did you know that this 'Sunny Side' song is the same as 'Last Week's Mail'?"...

'Last Week's Mail' has since become the most covered song in history, being done by over three hundred different artists. The lyrics are as follows:

Last Week's Mail had happy words,

She loved me, but I hadn't heard

That this week she had let me down,

And in my deepest sorrow I will drown.

Last Week's Mail was very sweet,

But since then I have chanced to meet

A side of love I hadn't seen,

But this isn't what love's supposed to mean.

Oh, why ever did she have to make me cry?

Oh, what ever made her say goodbye?

I can only fathom where our love would sail,

But our love went out like Last Week's Mail.

Last Week's Mail had happy words,

She loved me, but I hadn't heard

That this week she had let me down,

And in my deepest sorrow I will drown.

Oh, why ever did she have to make me cry?

Oh, what ever made her say goodbye?

I can only fathom where our love would sail,

But our love went out like Last Week's Mail.

Like Last Week's Mail.

(hum last line's melody)

In July, the American-only album 'Beaters VI' reached number one in both the American Muggle and wizard charts. By now, wizards and witches around the world loved the Beaters just as much as Muggles had from the beginning. This was due mostly to the invention of a magic-using CD player that could play Muggle CDs with magic (despite this influx of wizarding fans, The Beaters never made any album covers with moving pictures). In the British wizarding chart, 'Wizchart', The Beaters occupied all top ten spots in July; in the American wizard chart, 'Music Junkie', The Beaters occupied the top eleven spots on the charts for all of July and the first two weeks of August.

On August 7, a few days before the premier of their new movie, the Beaters released the single 'Gasp!/I'm Brown', instantly reaching the number one spots on all four major charts (Billbroad, The Weekly Standerd, Wizchart, and Music Junkie).

HARRY: When I made the song 'Gasp!', I really meant it. I was gasping for air. We had so little time to ourselves that we felt like we were drowning. It was especially so for me, because this was my 'Fat Elvis' period in which I didn't want to do anything but eat and sleep. It was just too much for me. But the 'Fat Elvis' period didn't last more than a year or so... (2020)

On August 10, the movie 'Gasp!' opened in Britain and opened two days later in America. On the fourteenth, the album of the same name was released, continuing the tradition of number one albums. In Britain, the album contained the songs from the movie as well as seven other new songs; however, in America, the album only consisted of the songs from the movie and four instrumental pieces from the movie.

OLIVER: The movie wasn't such a big deal, considering we'd done one already. We were getting tired of touring, so we were just sitting there, hoping it would be over soon...

The plot of the movie is simple enough. I get sent a sock from one of my fans, but it turns out to be some sacrificial sock from this Indian cult. Now this cult wants the sock back, but I had already put it on me foot and I couldn't get it off! So in the movie we were basically running away from this cult, as well as from a mad scientist who wants the sock so he can rule the world. It's weird, but it's a movie...

On the set of 'Gasp!', Seamus was introduced to Indian music; this would prove to be a very influential influence on Seamus and the Beaters.

SEAMUS: On the set of 'Gasp!', there's this one scene where we're in this restaurant, and this Indian belly-dancer is there. In those scenes you can see me mesmerized by her. That started my interest in Indian music...

On the fifteenth of August, the Beaters started their third US tour by playing to a crowd of 56,000 screaming fans at Shea Stadium, home of the New York Mets.

RON: At the halftime or whatever it's called in baseball, we landed on the field in a helicopter. The helicopter let us off and we went to this stage that they had set up earlier, and we played our stuff. The thing was that the music was being played over the loudspeakers, so it wasn't as loud as it would've been at a concert. We played four songs total to the deafening crowd: 'Gasp!', 'Last Night', Seamus' 'I Feed You', and 'I'm Brown'. It was pretty crazy...

HARRY: By the end when we were doing 'I'm Brown', we were getting pretty insane. I was playing the keyboards with my elbows and feet and my head, and Seamus was laughing so hard that he couldn't play the guitar... (2011)

OLIVER: After the performance to the screaming masses, we got back into the helicopter and took off. Something must've been wrong with the helicopter landing thingies or something because the field got ripped up when we took off...

After Shea Stadium, the boys had a little time to relax. However, in this period, the boys were introduced to something else that would forever change them.

HARRY: And so I will tell you the story of the 'Wicked Vice President'. Well, a good friend of Seamus', Al Gore, invited us to his house one day (he had a summer apartment in London). We got there, and he gave us some coffee and some lunch or whatever you do when you invite people over. Anyway, in attendance were Seamus, Lavender, Parvati, me, Al, and his wife Tipper. After we finished the food he gave us, me and Seamus asked if we could check our e-mail on his computer (by then we had all kind of grown into the Muggle world). He said, 'Sure, boys. I have four computers right over here; Lavender and Parvati can check theirs too. By the way, I invented the Internet.'... (2015)

SEAMUS: The four of us sat down at our separate computers, and we all logged on and all that. Then it turned weird. Al had whispered something in Harry's ear and he all of the sudden looked horrified. Harry said to me, 'Seamus, we've been slipped DSL!'

Of course, I didn't know what he was talking about. Then I looked at my own screen: it was instant access. I clicked a button and I was immediately at a site; it was freaky. I still wasn't sure what DSL was, but it was great. Then after we checked our mail (amazingly fast, of course) Al said, 'How about you all log off and have another coffee?' We didn't get why he wanted us to get off so soon, but we did anyway. As soon as I got up from the desk, though, everything seemed to be going in slow motion. After spilling our coffee all over ourselves in fits of frustration (because the liquid was moving too slowly for us), Al took us to the elevator at the apartment building; it was horrific. The elevator trip only took about ten seconds to get to the lobby, but it seemed like ten hours. We all figured that the elevator was taking us to hell (a.k.a. the bad place) because it was going so slow, and so we all began to scream...

OLIVER: Ron and I were in the lobby when they got out of the elevator, and they were all yelling and screaming like they were mad. I asked Al if we needed to take them home, and he said that he would, so Ron and I left...

HARRY: So then Al tried to get us in his car, but we didn't understand what he was saying because everything seemed so slow. I was thinking, 'Why can't he just say one quick sound to get the point across? I want instant gratification!' DSL gets you that way; you get used to going at the speed of light and then you hit a brick wall. So then Seamus, Lavender, Parvati, and I all went out to Seamus' little car (much to the protests of Al and Tipper) and sped away before they could stop us... (2015)

SEAMUS: I was driving as fast as the car would go, and it still seemed like we were standing still. Eventually the car gave out, and we sat there in the middle of the road until Ron and Oliver decided to send a search party that night. The whole time in the car, we were talking like chipmunks; or at least that's how it must've sounded to someone not on DSL. But we could still understand each other even though we were speaking at ultra-high speeds and frequencies that only dogs can hear...

DSL would prove to be an even bigger influence on the group than Goldfish were.

OLIVER: They eventually got DSL hooked up in Harry's flat and I tried it immediately...

RON: I was too scared to try it at first. They say that once you've been on DSL, you change forever. I was worried that I'd take it and I'd be like 'Oh, shoot, where do I live?'. So I didn't take it for about a year and a half after the others did...

HARRY: Like a week later, we went to California to visit some pals, and we all (excluding Ron) went on the DSL connection there and were all like floating around all day around their pool. Terrence Lilac was there (the bass player for The Taxmen) and he had gone on DSL too, and he kept pointing at these stretch marks on his body and saying, 'Look here! I know what it's like to be fed!' He was very un-cool. However, his incessant outbursts inspired the song 'She Said'... (2017)

SEAMUS: I was in the pool there, everything going extremely slow, and all of the sudden I see this guy from the press there. I was like, 'Oh, crap, there's a guy over there.' We were worried that he would start talking to us or something and figure out that we were on DSL, so we got the point across to Ron that he needed to distract the guy...

RON: They couldn't talk slow enough for me to understand them, so I had Harry write down what he was trying to say. He hastily scribbled, 'GET THAT GUY OUTTA HERE!' So I turned and saw this guy who had wandered upon us like a lost dog; I took him into the house and played a few games of chess with him. After he lost three times, he told me something obscene and left...

The next day, the boys were taken back to Britain , where they were invited to meet Paul McCartney at his home in London.

OLIVER: That was probably the best thing that had happened to me up to that point. I mean, it's not everyday that you get to meet Sir Paul, and it's especially not every day that he invited you to jam with him. His wife Heather was there at first, but Paul sent her out of the room because he didn't want her to embarrass him in front of us. I was honored...

HARRY: We were there literally all day. We got there at nine in the morning, and we were there until one o'clock in the morning. Basically what we did was jam on the guitar (and Oliver on the drums) and we talked about the finer points of songwriting and performance... (2006)

RON: Since both of us were bass players by profession, he gave me a few tips on playing, as well as on songwriting...

SEAMUS: It was depressing when we had to go. We said our good-byes and all that and immediately fell asleep when we got into the car to go home...

SEVERUS SNAPE: I arranged the meeting between the boys and Sir Paul, but I didn't go myself. I didn't need to go: me and Paul go way back. It's not a very well known fact that I grew up in Liverpool... (2005)

At the end of August, Severus Snape received a letter from the Minister of Magic telling him that The Beaters would each be awarded an Order of Merlin, First Class.

OLIVER: He came in and said, 'You're getting OMFCs!'...

RON: Snape said, 'What do you think about that?' 'What is it?' we asked. 'It's a medal!' 'Oh, great, a medal!'...

SEAMUS: We arrived at the Ministry building and there was this guy telling us all what to do when the Minister gave us the medals. 'Don't turn you're back on him--Don't sneeze--Don't bow this way--Don't bring any food or drink items into the area--Don't speak unless spoken to--Don't breathe...' It was just ludicrous...

HARRY: A lot of the old geezers who got the medal before we did sent theirs back because they figured we were degrading the medal or something. They got their medal for fighting the Dark Arts or something; they figured that we shouldn't get it because we were just four long-haired kids who had a few number one records. But you know, it's all just an act; there's no sovereignty to the Minister or any of those leaders. They're just regular people. The sad thing is that they don't see that... I think part of the reason we got the medal is because Minister Smith figured it was a good way to get reelected... (2011)

RON: Before the actual ceremony--which would take place in a special ceremonial hall in the Ministry building--we got a little tour of the place. It wasn't a really great tour, but still, it's more than you would see otherwise. We were so jittery before the ceremony that we all sneaked into the bathroom and did little Relaxing Charms on each other. We didn't do a lot of magic in those days, so we were surprised when we didn't end up blowing each other's heads off...

OLIVER: We were all taken into the ceremonial hall or whatever, and we marched up the hall and stood in front of the Minister of Magic, Patrick Smith, and bowed and all that jazz. Then we each went up and got the medals and then they took pictures and we were allowed to just mingle or whatever. The Minister came up to me and said, 'So you started the group?' And I said, 'No, I was the last to join.' Then he asked, 'How long have you been together?' And Ron said, 'I wouldn't know.' It was funny at the time...

SEAMUS: We then all sat at this table and had a press conference where we all got our pictures taken. Years later in 2009, Harry sent his OMFC back to protest the wizard-Muggle separation stuff...

HARRY: I sent it back because the Ministry was just nutters. They pass laws every day regulating our every move so that we don't get 'caught' by Muggles. I believe that The Beaters were very influential in easing the Ministries view on that. I mean, we were wizards who were famous in both worlds... (2020)

OLIVER: Harry sent his back, but the rest of us weren't that insane...

On September 11, the American 'Gasp!' soundtrack reached the number one spot on the charts and stayed there for nine weeks. The next day, 'Last Week's Mail' was released as a single in America, instantly reaching number one.

On September 25, 'The Beaters' Show', a Saturday morning cartoon of the Fabulous Four (using impersonators for the voices), began it's two year run in America. While the show stopped making new episodes after 2007, reruns aired for years afterward.

RON: The cartoons were just weird; it makes you feel funny when you're watching a cartoon that's supposed to be you...

On December 11, after months of touring, The Beaters released another album, 'Beater Soul'. This album, while not departing completely from their beat music style they had developed, did venture into new corners of rock and roll. On the song 'Danish Pine', for instance, The Beaters used a sitar for the first time.

SEAMUS: I didn't know how to play or even tune a sitar then, so I just figured out what the melody of the song was and played it along with Harry's singing. It adds a very nice touch to the song...

The sitar would prove to be a very influential part of Seamus', as well as The Beaters', music. 'Beater Soul' went to the number one spot at once in Britain and America.

On the eighteenth of December, The Beaters released a 'double A-side' single, 'Day Flipper/We Can Do It My Way'. This single (which was really two different singles) was released both with 'Day Flipper' on the A-side and 'We Can Do It My Way' on the B-side and 'We Can Do It My Way' on the A-side and 'Day Flipper' on the B-side. This strategy made both songs go to the number one spot (at a tie).

At the end of 2005, The Beaters were very tired of touring, and they wanted to focus on the studio, making better songs possible. Also to take into account, the songs that were being made were becoming too complex to perform on stage. The Beaters were feeling pent up; they felt as though their full potential was not being tapped.

The next year, however, would bring many changes to the Fabulous Four, their music, and the music industry altogether that nobody, not even the boys themselves, could expect...