Harry Potter and This Year's Interviews

Harry Potter and This Year's Interviews!

Author: Let's meet our journalist! Ennil!

Ennil: No last name!

Author: What do you want to say before we start the interview?

Ennil: +%&+%^&&/0*** off!!!!!!!!

Author: Oookayyyyy.

Chap.1: Harry Potter!

Ennil enters into Harry's dorm room and finds a sleeping Harry.

Harry: Who are you?! Get away from me! Helpppppppp!

Seamus: What's going on?!

Ron: Harry's been attacked by a sexy journalist. Hey! Wait a second! Why is he attacked by the sexy lady?!

Ennil: Because your interview will be on chapter 3! And thanks for the introduction, I'll see you after the interview.

Ennil winks at him and he blushes.

Harry: Hey! What about me?!

Ennil: Humpfff! Did you forget yesterday?

Harry: Oh yeah! Hehehehe!

Author: Would you guys just get to the point!

Ennil: Yeah, yeah, and yeah! So Harry, what's your name?

Harry: Elvis Presley, thank you very much!

Ennil: Yes, well I never knew you idolized him.

Harry: Nobody knows that about me.

Ennil: You know most journalists would ask you why you idolize him but I'm not most journalists.

Harry: Yes, I learned that last night.

Ennil: So, tell me Harry, who is in your heart right now?

Harry: What?! That's not the question you normally ask!

Ennil: Well, the author thought it would be better if I asked these %/+&+/++&%%54 questions!

Harry: But...

Ennil: Just go along with it!

Harry: Well, as mostly fics would say I am in love with Mary Sue.

Ennil: I see so...

Harry: interrupting but as others would say I'm in love with Hermione, Ginny, another stranger, Malfoy, Ron...

This goes on about two hours and Ennil is now sleeping

Harry: ... and Snape!

Ennil: What? You finished?

Harry: Yes, indeed.

Ennil: Now, let's go to a Muggle survey that's been done in another fic (I really loved so I got it!)

Harry: Great!

Ennil: Here is the form!

Form:

Harry: No, being with you right now in this perfect place...

Form:

2. Do you believe in God?

Harry: I believe in the greatness we all give and the...

Form:

3. What was your first word?

Harry: You better stop cutting my words or I'll...

Ennil: Harry, it's just a form, go on.

Form:

4. What do you want to be when you grow up?

Harry: When I was baby I wanted to be a duck. I thought I was the ugly duck. Now I want to be a swan.

Form:

5. What's your favorite food?

Harry: Duck intestines mixed with worms. What? Why are you looking at me like that?!

Form:

6. What is the weirdest thing you have ever done?

Harry: Pee on Snape's shoe while he was sleeping.

Severus: What?!!!!!!!!!!!! That was you?!!!!! Why you little weasel!

Harry: How did you get in here?!

Ennil: That was a wonderful question Harry! But we will find that in chapter 2! Stay tuned!

Author: My English teacher always does that.

Ennil: Thank you for that really unimportant remark. I'm sure the readers will not care about your personal life!

Harry: Can I say something?

Ennil: Who are you?!

Harry: dark voice. I'm Harry Potter, son of James Potter and heir to nothing in particular.

Ennil: chuckling. What?

Harry: Where's the form? I want to finish with the questions!

Ennil: Yeah, yeah!

Form:

7. If a naked man would jump here right now, what would you do?

Harry: Who would be the naked man?

Form: Who would you want it to be?

Harry: Hmmm... Probably Draco would be nice... I'll invite him in.

Form:

8. If you were stranded on a desert island?

Harry: I would... Defeat Voldemort

Form:

9. If you were stranded on a nude beach?

Harry: Defeat Voldemort..., then call Draco and tell him to come here.

Form:

10. When will you die?

Harry: After I defeated Voldemort

Ennil: Why is his name "Flight of death" anyway?

Harry: I don't...know! Weird name to give a child.

Ennil: Even though he gave it to himself...

Form:

11. If you would take a picture of one glorious moment which one would it be?

Harry: Probably the one were I defeat Voldemort.

Voldemort: What is it with you trying to defeat me?

Harry: dark voice Oh, you are here! I shall challenge you!

Harry gives Voldie a lightstaber and takes one for himself.

Voldemort: What are these vulgar machines?

Voldemort pushes a button, light (laser, or the thing that's supposed to come out) comes out from the bottom and hits his man parts.

Voldie: rolling on ground Ay! AY! AY! AY! AY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ennil: Well that's for today! Now I've gotta find Ron! See you in the next chapter!

Harry: Well, at least I missed Potions...