I Love You, But Please Die!

"Presenting, Miss Belladonna Henrys!"

Oh man. That's me. What was I supposed to do again? Somebody pushed me from behind until I was standing on the bright stage. The lights were all glary and I could barely see a thing apart from the long runway in front of me. I noticed I was stumbling so I stood up straight and started walking. The only thing this part of the night includes is walking down the stage and back up, all the while not loosing your cool and trying to stay as attractive as possible. I can remember Mum telling me what I was supposed to do...

"Strut, strut, strut, strut, look to your left - keep strutting. Strut, strut, strut, strut, look to your right," somebody hissed.

That would be Mum, breaking the rules and going backstage. Dad told her to sit down and stay seated, but obviously she disagreed. I took four steps and shot a smile to my left without stopping. A big amount of clapping followed as I took four more steps and turned my head to the right. The clapping was getting louder. I counted four more steps and looked to the front. This is the point where I stop, turn, wink, smile, pose, smile even brighter and walk back. I managed to pull it off, but I'm not sure who I winked at. Probably some perverted old man.

"Darling, you were wonderful!" Mum squealed, jumping up and down once all the Debutantes were released back to the crowd.

"Mum, you're embarrassing me!" I said, putting my head in my hands as I noticed a few kids laughing at us.

She ignored me and turned to Nick. "Nicky, take your sister out to the dance floor and show her off."

I mouthed the word 'no' behind her back, but Nick just smirked and grabbed my arm. "Of course Mum. All the other girls will be jealous." God bless the poor, disillusioned boy. Making those girls jealous by using me is probably as easy as finding a straw coloured needle in a hay stack. Make that a hay silo.

Mum smiled. "Of course, Nicky. Now go make her look extra special!"

Gag!

Nick pulled me across the crowded hall and over to the dance floor. Unfortunately, Rod Stewart was playing out of the speakers and I had to do some form of slow dance with him. He grabbed me around the waist and spun me around a few times. I feel like a show pony. You know the type where they have no choice but to do what their owner wants? On the fourth spin, I noticed a lot of the dolled-up girls watching us. And was that jealousy on their faces? I grinned and twirled. Seeing as I have two left feet, I did a horrid job of dancing and stood on Nick's feet a few times. What can I say? I am fighting a lost battle with gravity. Once the song had ended, Nick bowed and I curtseyed. We normally never do that kind of a thing even at formal parties like this one, but Mum was watching and she would spiflicate us if we didn't. I'd like to keep my head, thank you very much.

"Come on, quick!" Nick hissed to me as the new song started and Mum looked away.

I quickly ran along beside him as he dashed off the dance floor. Now, I'm telling you, it is very hard in high heels whilst having to look gorgeous at the same time.

"Nicky, where are we going?" I huffed, stopping to act graceful as I passed one of the judges.

"Just follow me!"

Okay. Sure, Nicky. I'll follow you around in high heels like a star struck loon on the night of my Debutant Ball. I'll even do it while my mother's back is turned and I am at higher risk of somebody seeing me do it and telling her than Mum finding me herself and getting an easier punishment because she looks like she has control of the conversation. Was he dropped on his head as a child?

"Through here!"

Without even looking where I was going, I rushed ahead of him through a door. What I didn't know at the time, was it was the door to the male bathroom. I stopped and looked around. Luckily it was deserted, but I knew that it would be crowded as soon as the host announces 'break time'. They all come in here for a ciggie.

"Yuck, Nicky. I can't be seen in here!"

Nick had already opened a door to one of the cubicles and pulled me inside, losing the door behind us. It was rather a tight fit with my dress taking up most of the room. The smell was even worse.

"Gross," Nick muttered, waving a hand in front of his nose to try and get some fresh air.

"You're telling me! What died? Actually, what didn't die?"

Nick looked around and noticed my dress hem was trailing along the floor and could probably be seen from the other side of the door. He slammed the toilet seat down and stood up on it. He held out his hand. I glared at it.

"Give me your hand!" he whispered, raising his eyebrows.

I gave one last disgusted look at him and placed my hand in his. Twin brothers can be really gross. Nick managed to pull me up and we both leaned against opposite walls. We were wedged in, our knees jamming together to keep us in a sitting position. There is no way Mum will find us now!

"I am going to kill you, Nicky!" I hissed, breathing through my mouth so I didn't smell any toxic gases.

Nick didn't reply. He grabbed the skirt of my dress.

"Oi! Put that down!"

He used the edge to hold up to his face and block out most of the smell. I grabbed the other side of my dress and held it up to my face too. It is a pretty smart idea. Most of the stench is blocked out and I am managing to actually get some oxygen to my brain. We had only been sitting like that for a few minutes when the doors opened and all the sound from the ball drifted in. I guess around ten or so men entered.

"I swear, if my wife takes me to one more of these things I'll pass out!" a deep voice said.

"Same here. My daughter hates them too."

Dad! I started to get up to go and give him a big hug and ask if we can go home, but Nick pulled me down.

"Do you want to be stuck in dresses all your life?" he hissed, putting a finger to his mouth.

I frowned. When I was pulled down I had whacked my head quite painfully. Sure Nick had done some rather nasty things to me in his life, but forcing me to sit in a smelly bathroom, hiding from my mother while my Dad and a few other men have a social moment right outside the cubicle I am currently jammed into with my twin brother definitely tops it all off. It's even worse than the time Nick asked me how people were born just as Mum walked through the door and thought it would be great to lecture us about it. Okay, maybe not seeing as I was only six at the time and when you are six, you want nothing more than to avoid those situations.

We sat around for a while until there were only a few men left over and they were just washing their hands. All the blood circulation in my legs had stopped and I was slowly loosing feeling. My neck was aching and my head was sore and all I wanted was to get out of there. By the look of things, Nick wanted to get out too. I looked around madly. There was a window above our heads. I pointed up to it and Nick followed my train of thought until we were both standing up, bashing on the lock so it would twist around and set us free. It didn't work. I released a kind of mangled scream and huffed.

"We are never going to get out of here alive!"

"Quit your whining and hold this!"

He pulled off his tuxedo jacket and stuffed it in my hands. I remained as silent as I could as he pulled his sleeves up and started tugging at the lock. After a few rough yanks, the lock came loose and the window swung open. It was a pretty tight fit and Nick barley fitted through. He jumped out and fell to the ground. It was dark and cold out. The window led straight out to a back lane that connected with the parking lot. There were a few trees around and a flower patch right next to the building. I started rising up on my toes to reach the window, but my shoes dug into me. I ripped them off and chucked them at Nick. He caught them and carefully placed them on the gravel. I threw him his jacket and started pulling myself out of the window. I got to my hips and I stopped. I was too big!

"I can't fit, Nicky!"

"Aww, Belle. Just try and slim down!"

I quickly threw myself back into the cubicle. In moments, Nick had a sapphire dress over his head. He obviously wasn't expecting it. Most people would think, being the Debutante I am, that I would not get myself locked up in the male bathroom and currently be standing on a toilet seat in next to nothing. I am living proof that having my Mum as a mother is not good for your sanity. I tried again to squeeze through the window. This time I made it in one piece. I dropped down to the concrete and grabbed the dress off Nick.

"By saying 'try and slim down', I did not mean take your clothes off!" Nick said, giving me a weird glare.

"Aww, is little Nicky all shy about having a sister who isn't afraid to strip down?" I cooed in the least suss way I could, but unfortunately somebody started coming around the corner as soon as I had finished.

Nick and I dived behind a bush and tried to stay as hidden as possible. It was incredibly awkward. Whoever the stranger was, stopped right where we had been standing and looked around. As their gaze swept over Nick and my hiding spot, we both breathed in and shuffled a bit closer to the bush. After only a few more moments, the person spun around and left. We both stood up and brushed the twigs and leaves off ourselves.

"Mum is going to kill us!" Nick whispered, staring at a hole in his pants.

"Just help me get my dress back on," I hissed, holding the horrid piece of clothing up.

Once I had squeezed back into the gown, I helped Nick put his jacket on properly and he double checked my hair. That is one of the good things about growing up with a twin brother and a mother like mine. Nick has some fashion sense and can honestly tell me if I look presentable. We carefully walked around to the front door, keeping and eye and an ear out for any people watching us, and slipped inside. We stuck to the walls and walked back over to the table. Mum turned away from whoever she had just been speaking to and smiled at us.

"That was some very nice dancing, Nikko!"

Any minute now and she'll compliment me.

"I'd like you all to meet Mr Cainbridge."

Obviously not.

She stepped to the side to reveal the man who came outside when we were escaping. He looked down his nose at us, making me feel incredibly short. He had greyish hair and steely blue eyes. He was taller then my mother, and very lean. I shuddered. He reminds me of one of those work-orientated rich snobs who think they are better than everybody else because they own four boats and a jet plane. He probably is.

"Lovely evening, is it not?" the man asked us, forcing the words out.

"Yes it is, Mr Cainbridge!" I said as cheerily as possible, extending my hand. He shook it briefly and stood back. Mum jumped in, trying to impress.

"Belladonna has come first in the London Mini Pageant!" she beamed. Mr Cainbridge is not impressed. Time to bring out the big guns. Mum took Mr Cainbridge by the arm and led him away, whispering to him like a maniac. I don't want to know what that was about.

"Come on," Nick said. "Let's go meet some teenagers our age."

Well, there is nothing better to do. I followed him around and he made some small talk with a few of the boys by the speakers. They were okay, I guess. Most of them looked rich and spoilt. Then again, so did ninety-nine percent of the people there. By the end of the night, I was exhausted. My feet were aching from the pain high heels bring and my head was all stiff from the hairspray. I just wanted to go home.

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Finally! We are home, and all in one piece. Dad managed to pull my mother through the doors and into the car where Nick and I had been waiting for almost a whole hour. I threw the clean clothes off my bed and dived into it. It was all silent apart from Mum and Dad having a heated conversation. I eventually fell asleep, hairspray and everything.

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I woke up to the sound of mother and father screaming again. I looked across to Nick's bed and noticed he wasn't there. That was weird. Nick always sleeps in. After looking around, I realised he was on the floor. I laughed for a few minutes before waking him up with my foot. He tossed and turned a few times before grabbing my shoe and throwing it at my face. He missed.

"Wakey wakey, sleepy head!"

"Go away, Belle!"

"Fine!"

I stood up and grabbed my towel. I managed to climb over my clean clothes and find my way to the shower. Mum and Dad were still yelling.

"No, Jan!" Dad screamed. "I can't do that to her!"

"Why not? It's what we decided on ages ago!" Mum yelled back. They are probably fighting about Grandma Dot. They have been moving her around for the past few years. In and out of nursing homes and retirement villages all over the place.

I hopped in the shower and pulled out my nifty makeup remover. Leaving makeup on overnight is very bad for your skin and your pillow. I rubbed most of it off, only getting my eyes a few times, and started on my hair. The spray had caked everything together and it was all stiff. I ripped big chunks out, trying to smooth it all down. After a good fifteen minutes or so, my hair was back to normal - as normal as it can get whilst being so close to my insane brain.

"Please, Mick!" Mum yelled as I walked back to my - and Nick's - room.

"Fine," Dad sighed.

"Thank you."

I quickly got dressed before Nick properly woke up and started sorting my clean clothes and making my bed. I don't think it is very practical to ban underage witches and wizards from using magic at home. Without wands, we have to do all sorts of chores and favours, wasting all our energy that would be better spent learning or playing. I suppose that with wands, we would get too lazy and fat. I don't want to be overweight, although it would annoy every last straw out of my mother. Payback would be sweet.

"Nikko boy!" I called in the most annoying and infuriating way possible of a morning. "Time to hop in the shower!"

He groaned and sat up. "I hate you!" he whined, tumbling out of bed and onto my feet as dramatically as possible.

"Oh, grow up! And don't you sleep in pyjamas anymore?"

"I like my boxers, thank you very much!"

Ew. Gross. Gag. Puke. Chuck.

"Nicky, darling? Have a shower!" Mum said from the door. Nick finally stood up and walked out of the room.

"Good morning, Bella!" she sung, sitting next to me on the bed. "What are you going to do today?"

I get a choice? Yes! I get a choice! Brilliant!

"I think I'll just pack for Hogwarts, if that's okay, Mum."

She looked put-out. "But Belle, I already packed for you."

Oh. I bet I'll open the trunk and find only frilly dresses and brushes. "Oh, well I'll just double check you packed everything."

"Okay, sweetie. Then we can go get our hair done together. I already booked us in because it's 'Father-Son day." She got up and left.

I despise Father-Son day. Do you know why? Because seeing as I am a girl and all my siblings are boys, they get to go off and do fun things with my Dad like bowling while I am stuck with my mother doing girly activities such as getting our hair done and picking out ribbons to tie in my ponytails. Fun, fun, fun.

"Okay," I called weakly after her and collapsed backwards onto my bed. Today will last forever.

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I look like a poodle. Not the type you want to hug either. The one you want to whack over the head with a shovel until all that is left is a small smudge on the floor. Mum took me to get my hair done and I came home looking like a freakin' poodle! I can't believe she did that to me. I was innocently sitting in the special seat at the hairdressers' and Mum goes "Give her a trim to look like this!". Of course, I couldn't see the picture she was holding up and couldn't object anyway.

I sat in the kitchen, waiting for Dad, Jason and Nick to come downstairs from where they were playing pool. Mum was humming to herself, fixing up the couch in the lounge room across the corridor. Nick came down first. He looked up at me from where he was by the oven and took a startled step back. He stared at me for a while before proceeding to laugh his butt off.

"Shut up, Nicky!" I scorned, throwing the salt shaker at him. He just would not cease laughing. He collapsed on the floor next to me, barely breathing.

Jason came down next. He looked up at the same spot Nick had and took a leap back, in the same fashion. "What happened?" he yelled, starting to laugh. I threw the pepper shaker at him. He too collapsed, clutching his sides.

"Guys, stop it!"

And Dad was lucky last. He looked up a little before my brothers had and stared at me. At least he didn't laugh. He spun around and walked over to my mother yelling, "What did you do to her?".

Nick and Jason burst into laughter again and even I smiled a bit. I have to admit, it is pretty funny. So long as I can fix my hair before tomorrow when I get on the Hogwarts Express. For some reason, I don't really think Hogwarts will appreciate my new do.

We spent the rest of the day trying to fix my hair with Dad's wand. We managed to get it to grow back to its normal length - halfway down my back - and even got it layered and styled. I am very proud of Dad. That night, I fell asleep almost immediately after checking my trunk (just as I thought, frills and ribbons all over the place. Luckily I managed to repack it and all the lace is currently stuffed in an old plastic bag under my bed). I've long ago learnt to block out Nick's snoring, so when I woke up, I was all refreshed.