2,881 - 2,900 of 5,429 Stories

Mrs. Weasley has a secret that she can never let anyone learn about. It would be the death of her and her dreams. Plus with crazy Lockhart cook book names, you can't go wrong reading this!

The Tri-Wizard Tournament is on, the new DADA teacher is crazier than ever, and McGonagall is getting sick of Snape in what rates as one of the most badly behaved years in his teaching career. How can all of this madness be present in one staff room without someone getting KILLED? CONSTANT VIGILANCE!!!! is what the DADA teacher would say, but to the rest of us, that doesn't make a whole lot of sense. Anyway, read to find out for yourself.

For reasons to be disclosed here Crookshanks is now to be called Wesley, Ron is no longer allowed in the girl's dormitories EVER and the inccident with Harry and the Underwear dance will never be discussed again.

Ginny's problems are those of a typical sixteen-years-old. But what happens when you add an attentive and attractive Draco Malfoy to that? Slightly AU, D/G

The Marauders are having a pretty boring day during the summer when James announces his parents have recently acquired something called a "television." They watch some, discover golf, and chaos ensues.

Wry!Harry, Mix-Master DJ Snape (yo), and Disco King!Voldemort all meet in the Forbidden Forest and get down with their bad selves. Also features gratuitous bird snogging and Lucius Malfoy's "Schnooglekins".

From the POV of the Nimbus2000...after being destroyed by the Whomping Willow, he has a few quarrels with Harry!

What everyone told Harry about the Death Eaters is not completely true. In fact, it's completely incorrect. What do the Death Eaters do at Headquarters, anyway? Plot? Torture? Kill? Nah, well, maybe torture. But not in the way everyone thinks. Join Lucius Malfoy for a typical Death Eater evening. Includes singing!Draco, Voldemort with an afro, and more! Be very afraid...

Soon after GoF, Voldemort returns to the Orphanage where he grew up, only to rediscover a powerful force even greater than himself.``Probably not what you think, but plenty of laughs! :)

Harry Potter is sick in bed! Who better to cheer him up than his once-arch-nemesis-now-lover, Draco Malfoy?! Huge fluffies alert! H/D--Slash!

Neville Longbottom, school teacher for Hogsmeade and Sleepy Hollow, comes into very close contact with a legend late one Halloween night.

Meet Blaise Zabini. A first-year Slytherin with anger management issues and an obssesion with cartoons and toaster ovens who curses more than a sailor.

Professor Eudice Eusyram returns, after over a year in limbo, to combat a new and greater threat then ever before!

What are Draco's deepest and darkest secrets? His agony over missing hairspray, and being liked by every girl in Hogwarts are just a few examples of what he rambles about in this one entry in his diary.

It's the summer holiday and Hermione's got a brilliant idea. Ron and Harry are completely against it but in the end, seem to be forced to go along with it.

Draco ponders how his point of view on love, girls, and cupcakes has changed since personally admitting his feelings for Harry.

Drusilla Quigley returns, taking Snape's advice, to interview Hagrid. But he's not really a loose-lipped twit... Er... is he?

In Seventh Year, James finally gets Lily. He may not have deflated his head entirely, he may not have turned into the ideal guy, but he has learnt to work for what he really wants. ````On Valentines Day, James puts Mission Get-Lily-Evans into action. Cameos by the other Marauders.

Boredom drives Harry and Ron to playing games. But when they start asking questions, will they be ready for the answers?

Sequel to 'Bellatrix Lestrange and the Housewarming Party Gone Wrong'. Same story, same madness. Harry's PoV. Read 'Bellatrix Lestrange and the Housewarming Party Gone Wrong' first. Only then will this story (almost) make sense (a little).

When Draco Malfoy is bored, it is a very dangerous thing...

What would you do if you woke up one day suddenly a whole foot taller, and sporting completely new hair that you didn't have when you fell asleep? Severitus Challenge warning... NO SLASH!

Ron is sick, and Draco uses this as a chance to get through to him. R/D

Look at the title and take a wild guess. Though...it's not exactly what you think.

After a month-and-a-half old relationship is ended, Ginny seeks time alone, but when curiosity gets the best of Ginny, she get killed. With a sarcastic but downright realistic guide, Ginny's afterlife is a lot more interesting then her life-on-earth. Observations, revelations, Ginny returning to life-on-earth as a Slytherin, a plot to kill Malfoy, and more abound.

Interestingly enough, another Ball is to be held at Hogwarts, and Ron's attention keeps returning to the same bushy haired know-it-all. Based on the song "Kiss Me Again" by Toby Keith.

Many people get detention at Hogwarts, in fact more then you might think. This story is based off of detention lines from FA students who have had to spend time with Snape, or Umbridge. If you've ever been to Scribbles in History of Magic, you've seen them around causing mayham and mischief.

Ron asks way too many questions.

The one thing every generation of Weasleys thought impossible, the one thing none had ever achieved, the one thing that will change one boy's life forever, has happened, and Ron will never be the same again....

She embarrassed him with that framed photo of him sleeping with a teddy bear. But when he decides to pay her back at her wedding, what will Ginny do to Ron?

Hogwarts gets a Physical Education teacher. Crossover.

It had been going like that for quite a while, when Remus sighed. "It's because you're a dog, isn't it?" ...Sirius gets excited by frogspawn.

It has been eight months since Harry Potter captured the renowned Death Eater Draco Malfoy. However, "recently uncovered evidence" has left some of the Ministry in confusion, while Harry seems to know more than he'll let on. A dialogue-only one-shot including Draco's witty banter and a few assumptions.

Hagrid's lessons are awful! He needs help to make them more exciting. Sirius was the last person he should have approached for a bright idea.

Blaise Zabini is on a Quest. Never mind that he isn't exactly aware of what this Quest may consist of (although it's suspected that it involves at least one rather conspicuous rhinoceros), but - nonetheless - he must Persevere until he gives evil a good thwack in the shoulder blades and rescues his Damsel in Distress.

Following a Quidditch accident, Lockhart transforms Draco Malfoy into a baby... who is then entrusted to Professor Snape. How will Severus handle his newest responsibility?

We promise you thrills, chills, Voldemort in a dress, and a totally Unexpected Plot Twist, now just read the fic, and review please. Thank you!

It is the first Christmas since the War, and Draco is determined to not enjoy it, but one obstacle continues to stand in the way of his unhappiness: Hermione Granger.

Harry has a strange dream in which eight American girls disrupt ``the quiet of the Gryffindor boy's room.

Harry gets a big shock at the end of the Tri-Wizard Tournament. He discovers new information about Hogwarts and its Founders...

First chapter of the parody book, Hairy Pooper and the Kidney Stone, based on the first Harry Potter installment.

Reading the notes that the Marauders pass during History of Magic class may tell you a thing or two about their mysterious ways.... (Please proceed with caution.)

Who'd have ever thought that the night Voldemort came to murder Harry, Lily and James could have been so. . . . amusing? Find out what really happened on that tragic and very silly night, and what spell Lily actually used to save her infant son.

It all started with a snowball, and now Harry, Ron, Hermione, Ginny, Fred, George, and (To the Gryffindor's immediate disgust) Draco Malfoy are in for their greatest, most dangerous, and somewhat comical adventure yet! (Put a major emphasis on yet)

When Draco Malfoy dies he appears at The Demented Room where he hears that he has to go back to Earth and make Harry Potter fall in love with him. Will Draco complete his task to be able to move on? Or will he fall in love with Harry also?

Marauders and marijuana. Innuendo. Wacky verbal hijinx (and a weensy bit of angst). Even members of other houses are oddly friendly under the influence! (Sirius/Remus preslash, Sirius/James flirting.)

Five years after finishing at Hogwarts, Ginny is a waitress at Diagon Alley's most upscale restaurant. Draco is a frequent customer, dining there every Thursday evening ... at one particular table that is reserved just for him.

After Harry read his MAD mag, he gives Ron a Lunchable. Superheroes around America hear of the Lunchables and come to get one. What none of them knows is that Emma Watson has been kidnapped by Voldemort.

Mad Eye once told Harry, don't put your wand in your back pocket, greater wizards have lost their buttocks because of it. Advice such as this always has a story to back it up. This is that story.

Post-OoP. Up to her old tricks again, Rita Skeeter attempts to interview Fred and George about their famous escape from school. Instead, she gets a scandal that will rock the ministry while the twins get revenge.

Harry/Draco ficlet. Draco takes Harry's glasses, and Harry will do anything to get them back... Slash.

Madison Bell (Katie Bell's little sister) is a Squib. In this AU fic, where Muggles know that wizards exist, Madison's band class goes to play at none other than Hogwarts. However, she doesn't expect what she finds: a pale blond boy who will go through anything to get her. Chapter 1: We meet Madison, Mr. Morello, Natalie, and some other random characters.

Draco Malfoy expounds on life, and about how much his is certainly, absolutely, DEFINITELY not centered around his arch-nemesis.

Hermione finds herself having to share Ginny's room with none other than Luna Lovegood. An encounter with one of the Burrow's more frightening residents ensures that forty winks will be hard to come by.

It's Arthur's birthday and Molly runs out of sugar. Small children and an eight-year-old in charge leads to a not-so-clean kitchen.

A fluffy little one-shot in which we become privy to a series of letters sent between the Golden Gryff Trio.

Harry drinks a potion that sends him to an alternate universe where Seamus has a crush on a Ravenclaw, and Harry has a crush on Seamus. Also prominently featured in the alternate universe is Draco vs. Voldemort. Harry wakes up in his universe brimming with ideas about how to kill Voldemort… and an insane crush.````Very random. Also, will probably be very AU.

This fic takes place at the end of OOTP during the part when Harry is attacked by Malfoy on the way back from the loo on the train ride home. I just changed it around a bit…. Slash, d/h

(Addition to the "Stuck in a Room with You" series.) Although everyone is on the verge of a nervous breakdown, the one with the earmuffs will prevail! Also featuring a house made of chocolate.

A bit of Professor Flitwick's lecture to his Seventh Year Ravenclaw class on Fidelius Charms. I love working out how magic works, and though it's not easy in this case, it's still fun; this is just a bit of magical theory.

Yes, your drug-addled eyes saw right - it's a sequel to that most ubiquitous of franchises, "Smoke Two Joints". In this extended sequel- wait, make that threequel, you'll see Draco and Hermione hot-box the Leaky Cauldron's restroom, Fred and George go on a road trip, and Harry practically destroy Number 4 Privet Drive with a party involving copious amounts of weed and alcohol. Guest appearences by The Bitchy Policewoman, Lord V. & His New Monikers, Lucius M., Lucius' cane, and its new partner, the Slytherin Pimp Car. Thrill to the covert yet noisy guest bedroom liasons! Try to find Draco's pants! Question the unruly spellings! Wonder how the hell Michael Jackson got involved in it all! Light it up, smoke it up, inhale, exhale, and read on!

They are sleeping outside. Even though Remus protested quite fervently earlier, he does admit that it is awful nice to sleep out here now, under the stars and the under a canopy of leafy branches that trick him into thinking he is in a rainforest. A bird in the distance sounds like a toucan and Remus pretends that this place is a tropical paradise, complete with a wild river (the still pond) and wild animals (James, Sirius, and Peter).

Even wizards get hay fever. Some get it really bad. And some have to pick the night before the Quidditch final to come completely apart with it. A sixth-year Gryffindor Chaser is not amused. Pure plotless sick puppy fluff. Mild hints of slash (SB/RL).

If fan fiction authors could rule the Harry Potter world, there'd be a lot of odd stuff going on. Welcome to the pilot episode of: ::start main theme:: The Harry Potter Parody Zone.

Remus is using a Magic Dictation Quill to make an entry in his diary. As he remembers the good old days, he resorts to the bottle to help him feel better. Every word he says is recorded.

"Know this, when the princess finally turns sixteen, she will die. And I'm not giving you any more details just so you won't be able to find a counter for it!" Great. Now what do we do?

Hermione's daughter has a question: "Mama, tell me about the first time you and Daddy kissed?" Well, most of us remember our first kiss and it isn't usually picture perfect. Ron and Hermione are no exception. This is in response to the fics that have two people who have never kissed before just suddenly kiss so well that it's as though they're seasoned veterans at it or something. Besides, embarrassing stories are so much more fun!

We know that in "Christmas on the Closed Ward" in Order of the Phoenix, everybody goes to visit Mr. Weasley on Christmas Day, but what happens when they get back to Grimmauld Place? I'll tell you what. Mayhem happens.

They all saw Sirius on the floor. He was writhing, twisting, and convoluting on the ground. "Professor!" James yelled. "I think Sirius is the one possessed by Satan!" A short little one-shot about Sirius pretending to be possessed. There are some opportunities in life that you just can't pass up.

Lily and the Marauders are out of Hogwarts, living on their own. James and Lily are engaged, but not married, and they live in Godric's Hollow. ``When a legitimate theatre opens in town, presenting the play Les Miserables, Lily is ecstatic and encourages the boys to``audition with her. However, there turn out to be more than wholesome muggle-borns who are interested in this project. Rated R for some bad words our darling ickle Sirius couldn't keep to himself! (Bad dog!)

Some excerpts: Nelly (the Loch Ness Monster) shook her head at the man with the fluffy pink bathrobe, sitting across from her at the table, she still in a daze. Just two weeks ago this man had come to her lake, disturbing her peace, trying to enlist her help in his plans for world domination, and now they were at a tea party, talking about pink lace and weddings. By this time Harry, along with his girlfriend Ginny, and their friends, Ron and Hermione, left; supposedly back to their home in Fluffville where they owned an (again, pink) house made of fluff. They did not plan on attending the wedding, but then again, who could resist the charms and wiles (feminine or otherwise) of ‘Uncle Voldie’?

Harry Potter awakes to leave the Dursleys on his 17th Birthday. The humor is a little dry and dark, but he leaves, presenting them with a gift. Slightly off canon at the end, but it is my first ever fanfic and I am proud! Rated PG-13 by author for insults and cruelty.

Fred and George are on a mission: To get their sister Ginny to stop dating the Slytherin Draco Malfoy. From hair cutting to lip gloss, the two redheads will stop at nothing to get them apart. All the while, Harry has a not-so-secret secret, Hermione and Ron argue(surprise surprise!), and it's all around madness in the castle! Will the twins succeed or will Ginny retaliate? AU, one-shot, and BEFORE Deathly Hallows. Also, there's a little slash, but it's not graphic and it's only mentioned.

Sometimes things can just sneak up on you when you're not really paying attention, which is par for the course for Sirius, who never does anything quite normally.

All those times they thought Hermione was at the library, she was actually donning a pink leotard and mask as a crime-fighting diva! Justice is served to Cho Chang and Mary Sue (read if you hate both of them).

The wizarding world is no longer safe... The Dark Lord has convinced the Leprechauns to join his side. Harry finds out that they are raping and murdering innocent girls. What can he do to save the world once again? Or will it be someone other than Harry that will save the day? You'll be horrified, you'll be sad, and then--at long last--you'll laugh hysterically.

Sequel to "Seamus Finnigan and the Search for a Soulmate." Harry's been dumped. But luckily his Gryffindor friends have a few ideas to get his girl back. Wait, did I say "luckily"?

Have you ever wondered what exactly the Marauders did while in class? Why, they wrote notes, of course! Here and now you can read the REAL notes from all four marauders with a special quest appearance from Lily Evans (soon to be Potter)! JP/LE, SB/OC, RL/OC, PP/please; you really think I'd give HIM someone to love?

Ginny/?? Ginny is the tease of Hogwarts, but what happens when the guy she actually cares for falls under her spell?

Seamus is having problems with his love-life. Ginny takes pity on him. When he tries an unconventional route to fix things... well... we'll just say that no good can come of this.

Sirius has an amusing idea.

Rowena and Helga discuss the school's motto and have some laughs. WARNING: Contains male-bashing.

What happens when Voldemort rediscovers love? This fic tells the story as Voldemort struggles with various things such as apologies, sighing, making bacon, and most importantly, what to put inside his goody bags.

Ever wondered how Lucius and Narcissa first met?

What if Caramel can actually get Sirius to notice her this year. Impossible, right? Maybe not with the help of a few of her friends.

McGonagall finds a new kind of music to get into. She is rapping going down the corridor when Harry, Ron and Hermione are in the same corridor. Oh no!

Ginny decides that for her sixth year at Hogwarts, she wants to take a journey in self-improvement.

Sequel to "Words Spilling Forth" Postnatal fluff, a new crib and a prediction coming true.

They kissed in the Library. Hermione left her notebook, and she wants it back. Draco has other ideas. The aftermath of the kiss, more kissing, less fluff. Arguing, man-boobs, and a whole lot of shared saliva. No drawing in this fic, but the plot revolves around the notebook in an ellyptical orbit. And Hermione laughs maniacally. D/Hr. Sequel to "Hermione's Addiction".

Did you ever wonder what made Petunia hate Lily so much? Could``it be because of... The Marauders?! A tale of what happened when Petunia``finally had enough. Takes place during their first year, at Thanksgiving break.``And yes, I know Europeans don't celebrate Thanksgiving, but I really don't care.

Subtitled "The Poor Sneakoscope That Died." Anyway, it's from the point of view of the Sneakascope that was imprisoned in Uncle Vernon's sock!

Harry and some boys are going to live twenty days in a castle, competing in a bachelorette-competition, with Hermione as the prize! She'll ditch one a day until there's only one left. But that's not all what happens: butterbeer parties, stupid tasks, betting, body transparation and ugly sofas comes up all the time. As if that’s not enough, Harry has to share a bed with Percy!

Therapist!Hermione tries to help Harry and Draco work out their rocky relationship. Complete with nightmares, mid-coital faces, cooking, bathtubs, hilarity, and a bit of fluff! (Slash: Harry/Draco)

It's Ron's 21st birthday - will he get what he really wants? The answer is no. But what happens when someone gives Harry firewhiskey? And what happens when Fred and George find a blender? ``Starring Kleptomaniac!Ron, Drunk!Harry, Desperate!Ginny, and lots of firewhiskey...

SuperSeme!Delinquent!Harry and UltraUke!Draco in an innuendo laden piece. Can't tell you what's going on or it will give away the story.

On Friday 27th of December, Ron and Hermione find themselves in a very strange situation - they are each other!

Pansy and Draco get together in the summer of their Sixth Year. Of course, they'll live happily ever after. Right? Nope. Draco dumps Pansy, humiliating her in front of an entire class. So, Pansy vows to get even. Ready for some fun? Pansy/Draco and Harry/Draco

It's 1977 and a storm is about to break that will shake the wizarding world to it's very core. Meet Mordred Leaohaire, a fatherless boy who only wants to be accepted; Laine Siswanto, a Star Wars-obsessed Muggle-born; Alcyone Black who wants to get out of her older brother's shadow; and Louis Malfoy who doesn't ``want to be associated with his family. Throw these four together and the next ``seven years at Hogwarts will surely be adventurous, especially with whispers of Voldemort's rise to power.

Sirius and Severus first meet at the tender age of eight... and the results aren't pretty. Now it's up to Regulus, an excitable seven-year-old, to convince a suspicious Severus that not everyone in his family is like Sirius. The Black brothers and Snape as children... aww, aren't they cute?

Aldura White, an unsuspecting Muggle, gets transported to Albus Dumbledore before getting into a horrific car accident, which could have led to the end of her life. While talking with Dumbledore, Ally gets offered a chance to save a family and change the future directly. She accepts, but gets more than she bargained for.